We live in a throw-away society don’t we? Seems like everything is disposable. Even things we value one minute can mean nothing in another. Think iPods. We wait for the new model to come out and when it does our old iPod just doesn’t seem to cut the mustard anymore. I remember when my boss handed me a Nano and I was so stoked. I just started working out at the gym and that Nano meant I could listen to my tunes now! I was so happy. But when my boss got her G4 iPhone that meant I inherited her G3 and all of a sudden I didn’t care what happened to the Nano anymore. Out with the old, In with the new. Being replaced is harsh sometimes. It’s especially easy to upgrade when your old model is not working like you think it should either. Instead of bothering to fix it…sometimes it’s just easier getting a new one.
I get that when some things break you just get new ones…a food processor, a faucet, a pair of shoes, or sunglasses…an iPod. But in the last week I’ve had some major repair issues in my life. My car is at the shop and I’m paying another $100 to get it inspected again because the first estimate from the dealership would have resulted in a $3000 bill. The night of my big Fourth of July party the electricity went out in my backyard which meant my pool pump would not work and neither would any of my backyard lights or pool lights. After replacing one of the breakers I still have no lights but thankfully the pump is back working.
My daughter mentioned the fact that the house was falling apart to her dad while they were having dinner and he told her, “That’s what happens to old houses, they break down and you have to spend money fixing them.” And it hit me that to him I must have been the pair of shoes because when our marriage started to crumble he didn’t think it was worth the effort or time to try and fix it. He just replaced me instead. It makes me think of this song. Killer song.
I thought about how much I prayed specifically for him to care and love again. But he did not value me and it was not meant to be. Instead God had other plans.
I got a ride home from the receptionist at the garage where I took my car to this morning. She was in her early 20’s and tried to call the owners for the ride but when they didn’t answer the phone she decided to do it herself. We got to talking about my job and since I work in ministry we also talked about church. She told me how busy she was and how she hasn’t made it to church in a long time. I told her about how she could watch or listen to services online and how Martin does that from England. She asked questions and ended up getting pretty much the whole story about Martin and by the time we arrived to my house she was smiling and said to me.
“Wow, maybe I won’t give up hope. Maybe God does answer prayers.”
And I thought. You know He really does. But most of the time they are not like getting the right answer on a multiple choice test. God does not pick from A, B or C. He does what he wants. It’s more like scoring high on an Essay test. He knows the whole story and all the important facts and supporting details. He knows how it is supposed to end, how it will end, and he listens along the way to our hearts. Psalm 37:4-5 says,
“Delight yourself in the LORD,
and he will give you the desires of your heart.
Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him, and he will act.”
I never took that to mean that he will give you what you want but instead that if you delight yourself in the LORD and are truly content as a child of God he will place desires in your heart that are inline with what He wants for you. When you commit to doing things His way you are walking in concert with him therefore what you want IS what God wants. You can trust Him and He will make certain that it happens the way it’s suppose to. You don’t have to worry. You don’t have to “make” it happen yourself. Just trust.
So I have to live that out in everything. I have to trust in the present not only in proven things from the past. So. I will not fret about my pool lights or my car. I know they are worth fixing. I will trust that God will provide me with enough funds to maintain the things He has entrusted me with. And I will focus on being thankful. And teaching my kids to value all the people God has placed in our lives. Because you don’t throw away people either.